It’s Pride Month, and while we’re out here celebrating ourselves, our queerness, and our freedom, let’s not forget to protect our peace—and our parts. Whether you’re linking up with someone new, finally vibing with that crush, or just want to make sure all your besties are staying safe. Here are eight things you can do to protect yourself and your partner before getting intimate.
1. Have the Conversation
Honest, clear communication is sexy. Before sex, talk openly with your partner about boundaries, STI history, testing dates, birth control (if applicable), and what you’re both comfortable exploring.
Discuss your relationship dynamics (e.g., monogamous, open, casual) and check in about any emotional expectations you may have. These conversations demonstrate care, reduce risks, and foster mutual trust and respect.
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2. Get Tested Together
Regular STI testing is one of the most important parts of sexual health. If you’re entering a new sexual relationship, schedule testing together—it can be an act of intimacy and accountability.
Look for clinics that are LGBTQIA+ affirming and offer comprehensive testing, including HIV, chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis, and hepatitis. Discuss retesting timelines and follow-ups, too.
3. Use the Right Protection for Each of Your Bodies
Protection options should match the type of sex you’re having and your anatomy. External and internal condoms help prevent STIs during vaginal or anal sex. Dental dams are great for oral sex on vulvas or anuses. Gloves can be helpful for hand play. Lube reduces tearing and enhances comfort—just make sure it’s compatible with your protection method (e.g., water- or silicone-based lube with latex condoms). Having the right tools ready shows care and preparedness.
4. Understand PreP & PEP
PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) is a daily pill or long-acting injection that can lower the risk of contracting HIV by up to 99%. It’s especially recommended for those at higher risk, including men who have sex with men, trans women, and people with multiple partners.
PEP (post-exposure prophylaxis) must be taken within 72 hours after possible exposure. Find a knowledgeable healthcare provider to help you explore what’s right for you.
5. Get Vaccinated
Vaccinations are an essential part of sexual health. The HPV vaccine protects against strains of the virus that can cause genital warts and certain cancers, and is recommended up to age 45.
Hepatitis A and B vaccines are strongly encouraged for anyone engaging in oral, anal, or rimming activities. Keep an eye on updates around monkeypox or other emergent viruses affecting LGBTQIA+ communities, and get vaccinated when eligible.
6. Check in With Your Mental and Emotional Readiness
Sex should feel good, not just physically, but emotionally. Are you in the right headspace? Do you feel respected and affirmed in your gender identity and body? Have you considered how this encounter might affect your emotional well-being or dysphoria (if applicable)?
It’s always okay to pause, ask for clarity, or say no—even if you’ve already said yes. Intimacy should come from a place of agency, not obligation.
7. Know the Signs of an Unsafe Situation
Consent is enthusiastic, informed, and ongoing. If a partner pressures you, ignores your boundaries, refuses protection, or tries to manipulate the situation, that’s a red flag.
If you’re meeting someone new, especially via dating apps, make sure a friend knows your location, meet in a public place first, and have an exit strategy. Safety is not paranoia—it’s preparation.
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8. Make Aftercare Part of the Plan
Aftercare is the emotional and physical support that happens after sex. It can include cuddling, words of affirmation, helping each other clean up, checking in emotionally, or simply relaxing together.
For queer folks, especially those navigating past trauma or identity-related stress, aftercare can be deeply healing. Don’t skip this step—the connection continues beyond the act.
Your health is your power. When we protect our bodies and care for each other, we create safer, more joyful relationships. Let this be a reminder that your health matters, your pleasure matters, and you are worthy of love that honors all of you
The post Let’s Talk Sex: 8 Must-Know Tips to Keep You & Your Boo Safe appeared first on Black Health Matters.
